"Skyblock teaches us that no matter how ridiculous the odds may seem, within us resides the power to overcome these challenges and achieve something beautiful. That one day, we'll look back at where we started and be amazed by how far we've come."
"Blood for the blood god"
"To be fair I'll get hella views when I'm dead"
"Well I just killed a small child"
"I'm so good at hitting small animals."
"Rank number 1 isn't an achievement, it's a prison which forces you to dedicate your life to defend a temporary title."
"All my subscribers are going to unsub immediately if I lose this."
"I had to take a break from drowning to get a glass of water."
"Say it with me. Not. Even. Close."
"I clearly remember there being an infant in this boat...did you eat that baby?"
"Do not put your plans and techniques in a Youtube video, you fool, you moron"
"I'm seeing a lot of death, but at least we have more trees."
"I'm just a hardworking honest man, stabbing people for coins."
"Of course I don’t suffer from hubris because hubris is a flaw, and I am perfect. Therefore, I don't have hubris."
"Thank you Hypixel"
"Take that, orphans."
"Good things don't happen to heroes"
"I don't believe in friendship, Tommy… We tell ourselves it's real so the cogs of society can turn… The only thing that's real, Tommy… is CASH!"
"Fear is the greatest motivator."
"My sleep schedule is perfectly synced up with North Korea. Make of that what you will"
"SUBSCRIBE TO TECHNOBLADE!"
"Absolute power corrupts absolutely"
"This is my main game."
"Now the first thing you do when you get married is you go to her- you go to your wife, and you take off all of her clothes. And then you put it on yourself for the stat bonus."
"And Mom said I'd never host a party. In your face Mom check this out"
"Buy my Youtooz."
"I wake up on Monday, I stab celebrities in Minecraft, and then I just go to sleep for another week"
"Party Games is my major, English is the minor."
"All I know is anarchy, violence, and get subscriber."
"Peer pressure, peer pressure."
"Dibs on earth."
"If Hypixel has taught me something, it's that if you have a problem, the answer is slavery"
“You see, back in high school, before I had a huge ego, a lesbian referred to me as ‘actually pretty funny’ and my ego has been coasting ever since! So, they’re all right with me. Alright?”
"I have the vocals cords to rule them all"
"I'm about to speedrun this man's funeral."
"I guess you have to respect everyone, except orphans"
"I am a billionaire and do not care about spending money"
"Ay caramba, donde esta la biblioteca!?"
"I don't have pants that explains it"
"Heh?!"
"I'm only getting by by the skin of my teeth, and teeth don't even have skin, that's how you know its messed up."
"Let's cyberbully some nerds."
"Your Honor in our defense it's hilarious"
"I was just like 'oh you're fine', its like being friends with the school shooter"
"I need an ego boost."
"Discord scales your voice to your subscriber counts"
"To simp or not to simp."
"If I want to die to a fire, all I have to do is go outside."
"DANCE POTATO BOY, DANCE!"
"You're the kind of guy to play against Magnus Carlsen in chess and take out his pawn and go 'OMG I took your pawn!' but he's like 'Oh but I took your queen-' 'I took your pawn!'"
"Respect women!"
"This sounds like my parents"
"What a nerd!"
"Ok I found another joke"
"It's like drop kicking a toddler."
"Ok this man should be taken seriously"
"I can tryhard any game"
"Everyone just fell off the map by themselves... I'll give you a helping hand though"
"Anybody that fights me gets the flame"
"This is the second-worst thing that has happened to these orphans in their lives."
"Withers are homophobic."
"Break a leg... and a neck"
"Chat, if my mic is muted then spam Canada"
"There's voices... Sometimes the voices say... E."
"ORDER, FREEDOM, LAG, the 3 pinnacles of Dante."
“No... No, this can’t be... this man... made eight potato eleven minions... and then he painted the Mona Lisa!"
"That never works, except when I do it because it works perfectly"
"I'm so good at video games."
"Guys its tactical"
"I'm used to playing tournaments a man down; we still got this."
"Quackity... they weren't always orphans"
"It's all part of my Master Plan."
“For reference, it took me three attempts to put on my shirt.”
”We’re gonna need another forest...”
They say that history is written by the winners, but I can't help notice him writing over there"
"This man’s been playing checkers, while I've been farming potatoes, he's through!"
"I'm not Alinity"
"This really says a lot about our society."
"We win these!"
"Do you want to be hero, Tommy? You want to be a hero, Tommy? Then DIE like ONE!"
"No that's where all my money is!"
"but in my defense, it was hilarious"
"Nope, only death"
"You could've voted for Barry"
"Let’s play a relevant game, like Grinch Simulator.”
"This guy is insistent on being a clown."
"HEEEEH?!"
"Tommy, the thing is, you're using words, but the thing about this world, Tommy, is that the only universal language is violence."
"Uninstalling"
"That's at least 12 pizzas!"
"You can't run away from all your problems… Not when they have ender pearls."
"Its ok I'm in the process of becoming hot right now"
”After 3 minutes have elapsed, you’re gonna want to give up on your dreams, like so.”
"One of us. One of us."
"Sometimes it's tough being the best."
"When I first made this grinder, I thought that I was trapping the skeletons. But now, I've realized I was only trapping myself... oh hey level 50!"
"If you wish to defeat me, train for another [multiple of 100] years."
"Phil wasn't here last time because he was getting married! What a simp! What a simp!"
"Can you change your name? You're ruining a lot of my catchphrases, I have to say."
"Think of how far I could dropkick a dog that small."
"There ain't enough room for the two of us on this server, boy."
"I am a ninja"
"Look, I'm an atheist, but when God sends me to hell, I want him to hesitate."
And we've officially recreated California's water supply"
"I'll be beating him after"
"What kind of question is that?!"
"Imagine dating a woman, total simp move, bro…"
"I've seen Irish famines with more potatoes than this"
Like my grandma, my blade is sharper than society. When President?"
"It is only with a worthy rival that one can reach their fullest potential."
"I immediately headed to the safest place I knew, Afghanistan"
"Technoblade... sometimes dies..."
"NEEEERDS!!!"
"Let me check my joke document"
"Technoblade never dies"
"I have been lied to"
"My doctor has me taking some new medication, so if in the future I am a completely unbearable douchebag, please let me know, because that means the medicine isn't having any effect."
"Are there any millionaires in the chat?"
"Lemme just slip the admins another $20 to keep rigging the game in my favor"
"I'm kindof tired I'm just gonna sit out the rest of this battle"
”It’s a Black Friday sale on the Earth and it’s 100% off. Add to cart.”
"I don't understand, how are women so short, how have they survived?"
“Startin’ the stream.”
"Dude, these orphans are getting destroyed."
"Everyone lets point our guns at him while we're seated, its like the US school system"
I'm the second worst thing to ever happen to those orphans"
"Murder isn't ok is most situations, but sometimes ya gotta make an exception if you know what I'm saying. I think that was a notable exception"
"Problem: 'My baby needs to learn to understand theoretical physics' - screw all of you who gave me this prompt. The solution: A GUN."
"That man had a family and its just gone now"
"He's the type to brag about non-final kills."
"Things were getting canceled so fast, people thought it was Twitter!"
"[Some stupid Minecraft username], that name strikes fear into their enemies."
"I dropkicked that child in self defense... Please officer you gotta believe me"
"If you see twins just kill one of them. Gets rid of a lot of confusion."
"I'm having fun, I dropped out of college for this"
"Let's stab this guy to death."
He's playing Skyblock while I'm playing Death Note!"
"Before you ask: yes, my parents are disappointed"
"Thats what my teacher said and then I made it a career" (After Skeppy said he can't bully people online)
"The thing about this world Tommy, is that good things don't happen to heroes"
"Everyone aboard the Technoplane!"
"You clowns still think you can face me?"
"You guys might kill me in 2 hits but I can kill you in one"
"Die die DIE!! Ha ha ha"
"Unfortunately for him that's my secret captain, I'm always stressed"
"I want the enemy to make at least 2 mistakes and here you see dream's second mistake is letting me get a bunch of these axe crits for free. Of course his first mistake was challenging me in the first place"
"Fortunately I have something that dream doesn't, comprehensive knowledge of ancient China".
"You know, some people say 'What is dead may never die', but those guys are a bunch of idiots!"
"Lesbians find me actually funny"
"Quiet Tommy the adults are speaking"
"Anyone who said be yourself, hasn't met Tommyinnit"
“I think the rats are trying to say that strange pigs sitting in mazes distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.”
“See I was actually using an advanced technique called LYING”
“On one hand, do I really want to end the world? On the other I have to go get chemotherapy in like fifteen minutes”
"Hippity Hoppity get off my property"
"This man kidnaps a baby, kills his father, refuses to elaborate. He’s on that sigma warden grindset"
"Ah, so it’s a feature”
“We could have had 25% more alchemy experience!”
“Man, you’ve gotta raise your standards”
. "I'm actually making a video, call the press!"
"Content can't get repetitive if i never upload"
"Hell yeah, underage drinking!"
"The power of feminism is the only reason why we've been able to win this game. That and you know, like, World War 2 tactics. Those are the 2 important parts of being able to left click on people"
"If I had 100 lives, I'd choose to be Technoblade every time"
Special thanks to FlameoftheeWest on reddit for gathering all of these quotes! All credit goes to them for making this list and I will gladely add more as time goes on.